buildings with a hundred floors, spinning 'round revolving doors.
baby i don't know where they'll take me.
entriesaboutchatlinks
breakaway
a short profile perhaps ?
a music player or hit counter ?
Eating disorders,
Wednesday, November 10, 2010 // 10:34 PM
At this rate I'm going, I'd die even if I don't commit suicide. The stress and everything. I feel like I'm anorexic. I've lost about 2 kg because I constantly tell myself that I'm fat and actually feel full all the time causing me to eat less. Does that count? Today, I've done badly for my exam. I'm nothing but pathetic. I'm super upset. Now, I wanna do nothing but eat and eat and EAT. I guess I'd become bulimic if that happens. I don't know why I have such extreme de-stressing methods. At least I'm not doing 'that' anymore. Who knows? Maybe I'd renege the agreement I had with myself again. Hopefully not. Things will get better only if the bitch named life stops being one. That's impossible. HAHA.
I remember when nothing stood in our way, when the world's spinning for us. Today, you were so very close. You can't imagine that rash impulse within me that wants to run straight to you and discuss how impossible the paper was. You can't even imagine how much I wanted you to hug me when I knew I wasn't gonna do well and cried. Maybe you didn't even see me in front of you. I keep trying to hate you. I'm trying to enrage myself whenever you're in front of me, but I can't. I'm only angry with myself for failing time and again when you re-enter my line of vision. I try to lie to myself, letting my brain be a renegade to all my other body parts. I try to hide the fact that my heart is still beating for you. Every time I see your face, I fail. All the hard work, all gone. My suppressed feelings made known again. I guess it doesn't matter at all. Not to you, at least. But then again, if it don't matter to you, it's meaningless to me too. I should be forgotten by now. It's like you've never had known me, and I never had enter your life. Only I am so stupid to keep hanging on, holding on to it. I just can't stop loving you. I'm sorry I loved you. I'm even more sorry I love you.
Eating disorders,
Wednesday, November 10, 2010 // 10:34 PM
At this rate I'm going, I'd die even if I don't commit suicide. The stress and everything. I feel like I'm anorexic. I've lost about 2 kg because I constantly tell myself that I'm fat and actually feel full all the time causing me to eat less. Does that count? Today, I've done badly for my exam. I'm nothing but pathetic. I'm super upset. Now, I wanna do nothing but eat and eat and EAT. I guess I'd become bulimic if that happens. I don't know why I have such extreme de-stressing methods. At least I'm not doing 'that' anymore. Who knows? Maybe I'd renege the agreement I had with myself again. Hopefully not. Things will get better only if the bitch named life stops being one. That's impossible. HAHA.
I remember when nothing stood in our way, when the world's spinning for us. Today, you were so very close. You can't imagine that rash impulse within me that wants to run straight to you and discuss how impossible the paper was. You can't even imagine how much I wanted you to hug me when I knew I wasn't gonna do well and cried. Maybe you didn't even see me in front of you. I keep trying to hate you. I'm trying to enrage myself whenever you're in front of me, but I can't. I'm only angry with myself for failing time and again when you re-enter my line of vision. I try to lie to myself, letting my brain be a renegade to all my other body parts. I try to hide the fact that my heart is still beating for you. Every time I see your face, I fail. All the hard work, all gone. My suppressed feelings made known again. I guess it doesn't matter at all. Not to you, at least. But then again, if it don't matter to you, it's meaningless to me too. I should be forgotten by now. It's like you've never had known me, and I never had enter your life. Only I am so stupid to keep hanging on, holding on to it. I just can't stop loving you. I'm sorry I loved you. I'm even more sorry I love you.
grew up in a small town,
and when the rain would fall down. i'd just stare out my window.
Hi, my name is MELISSALOKQIANHUI.
I’m currently in BOWEN secondary school, in an awesome class 3e2/4e2
I’m a part of the Bowen Military Band
That’s all you need to know, really.
dreaming of what could be,
and if i'll end up happy, i will pray.
wanna feel the warm breeze,
sleep under a palm tree, feel the rush of the ocean.
