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buildings with a hundred floors,
spinning 'round revolving doors.
baby i don't know where they'll take me.

entries about chat links



breakaway
a short profile perhaps ?
a music player or hit counter ?
Tuesday, February 2, 2010 // 10:35 PM

It's how much you mean to me that shocks me. Something that appeared in my book. Recently, life just can't suck more. That recently is today. I tried, but I failed terribly. I can't be more of a hypocrite nowadays, I guess. I thought that I'm really fine and okay. I actually managed to fool myself. It's a bit too scary. I can't get out of that thought, I can't imagine myself fooling myself and everyone else. I disappointed everybody again, maybe, maybe I'm just not strong enough.

Life gets on. I'm okay with everything now, I guess. Studies are going fine, but I'm starting to find math a chore. I hate questions that requires long steps. Well long steps = more careless mistakes. And that suck. I got 39/40 for the stupid e-math quiz thanks to one pathetic careless mistake. I hate it when I get too blur, or too stupid. Haha... Nobody likes being stupid all the time. That includes me. Haha... I'm having a sugar rush now. I didn't even eat anything sweet.

Things will go fine, that's what I'm gonna brainwash myself with. Talked to Rafiqah for quite awhile just now. I told her everything. Lalala... Cried the second time. I need to get a grip on myself. Can't put anything on hold anymore, this few days especially. I'm really going crazy. In a good way, the crazy. At least for that few moments I can forget everything. It's weird how we got close to each other. Damn funny way, but at least nothing gets in the way of me confiding her now. Well, things will go fine. It will. Jake's gone for a few days. No no, won't see him on Valentines' Day. No crazy stuff that day. Haha... Before I get an heart attack, no more crazy people on Valentines' Day until the day my relationship changes. God knows how long I'll have to wait till that happens. Fast enough, I hope. At least that'll help me get through this. Jake! Can't imagine time flies, he'll be off to study soon again. That'll be in two years time. HAHA...