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buildings with a hundred floors,
spinning 'round revolving doors.
baby i don't know where they'll take me.

entries about chat links



breakaway
a short profile perhaps ?
a music player or hit counter ?
Thursday, January 14, 2010 // 10:44 PM

It's shitty, but I guess it'll be fine soon. Hopefully. Don't ask me, I don't wish to tell. I've disappointed a lot of people today. I'm really sorry everyone for making you people so worried, especially Jake. I know I shouldn't have done that. Thank you for rushing down all the way from home even when you're really ill.

I don't know what I'm doing. I really don't. So really don't ask me why. I don't do things for a reason. I can't control it anymore. My heart is controlling my brain and that's not leading me anywhere further. It's making me feel much worse because I really don't know what I'm doing, and what I'm gonna do. Everyone is so angry with me now. I even lost count on how many times I cried. Good thing there's Thanaphon, Mandy and Han Meng from stopping me from doing even more stupid senseless things. Thank you people for keeping me sane for a few hours.

I'm really touched by everyone's concern for me, I'm sorry I still feel as lost as before, further disappointing everyone. Should have let Melynda slap me just now, so that I can wake up and regain my sanity. Sorry for throwing tantrums at everyone just now, I really can't stand it when everyone crowds around me asking me if I'm okay, why I did this, why I've done that and things like this. I know you people are really concern, but I need some space. Thank you Huilin, Rafiqah, Erika, Eric, Wei Xiang, Bea, Mei Hui, Kevin, XY, Thanaphon, Han Meng, Mandy, Melynda, Jovian, Tristian, Tristen, Jake for everything today. Thank you Huilin for accompanying me to lunch, hugging me and encouraging me. And Rafiqah, I know I really disappointed you and made you angry, forgive me, because I don't know what else to do, thanks for being there. Thanks Erika for listening to me crap and rant after band just now, I feel much better after crying and saying everything out. Melynda, Jovian, Trishes and Jake, thanks for rushing down immediately after knowing that I was in a foul mood, even when you people didn't know what happened. Thanks XY for helping me say that J word out which made me laughed a lot for the randomness. Thanks to everyone else for being so concerned and being so caring just now. I apologise for my shitty attitude. I was really feeling very bad. Don't stare at that part, it makes me feel uneasy. Don't get it, just bang the wall. Haha...

Till then,
Melissa.

PS. I don't know how you do it, I hope I can, but I can't. I'm not as emotion-less like you. Your requests are just far too much for me to accept. Don't forget why, I still love you.